One of my professors wrote this for me to think about:
"I challenge you that rather than searching for others' great ideas and practices, you start to look into yourself - what interests and passion do you have? what talents do you have? what dreams do you have? and what it takes for all those to come out and meet/enrich the world? "
The answer to these questions is I don't know. I have a variety of interests, passions, and talents. My dilemma is that I don't like to remain on one project for an extended period of time. I think that may be one of the reasons that I like technology so much, it is constantly changing and there is something new to explore.
I don't know if I want to be a school teacher. I do love teaching but at the same time I am in the school system doing preinternship and there are so many things that I see that I just don't want to do. I'm learning one way of teaching at school and another way in the classroom and I don't get to practice what I want to. I am very uninspired by my current placement. I am not saying that she is doing things wrong because she has some really good ideas and practices. I think I am unexpired because of the lack of choice within my lessons. I don't get to try what I want.
Another reason I am unsure is because I am used to playing with students to help them learn (early childhood) and all the playing seems to stop once they hit grade one. This is one of the reasons that I am drawn to inquiry based learning. Students questioning, exploring, learning, and following their interests deeper. I haven't seen this in action and won't have the change to explore it fully until I am a teacher and I am scared that before that happens I will pick up other habits that are easier and become complacent. I know that I can fall into rutts and if I am not inspired I will not try. I can see myself doing this constantly right now in my classes. I am happy just floating by. So far the class that I have put the most effort into is Arts Ed and that is because I really like the arts. I also really like technology and loved taking my ECMP classes and learing new things with technology. The outdoors and field trips are another thing that I think I would really enjoy doing with students. I love being outside and i believe that so much learning can happen in a real situation compared to from out of a book.
As for dreams, I dream of travelling. I love going to new places and experiencing different cultures. I am put outside of my comfort zone and forced to meet new people and experience new things. I don't do this often enough when I am at home although I have been trying to more and more. So right now, I would like to travel to another country for my first year of teaching. I believe there is alot that you learn from other places to do with the education system. Different techniques, strategies... I learned so much when I was in Australia and taught there that I didn't know. I am not very socially aware although I want to be. I try and make a difference everyday personally but I still live in my own little bubble. I think that is why I like travelling because I am always outside my bubble and learning new things.
I wish we had the opportunity to go into a classroom and just try out what I would like to try and then go back to my section and debrief with them. You have an opportunity to learn without complete failure and then have a support group that can help explore options with.
I just don't know is my answer... I have answers but they don't seem to give me direction. I want to be inspired and have a vision of where I want to be but I just can't seem to find it. I don't know if there is a way to find it other than through trial and error.
I want to be a passionate person and teacher. Right now my passion is travelling and I'm not sure how that relates to teathing.